Dear Annie: This is a letter to my wife, a longtime alcoholic

You were seven years older than me and sobbing. I know we all have choices in life, but you have made my sister’s life so blurry, that choice in itself is confusing. Whilst you are around, she can’t possibly think straight, let alone make good choices. If you purchase a product or register for an account through a link on our site, we may receive compensation.

  1. Remember that there’s no one-size-fits-all approach, and you should choose the method that resonates most with your unique situation.
  2. You became the most difficult relationship I ever had.
  3. This approach to communication is beneficial because when you write a letter, you get to choose your words carefully.
  4. Or they can sell their souls for a cheap drink.
  5. It is with a heavy heart that I write this letter, but I believe it is crucial for us to confront the reality of your alcoholism.

I was overwhelmed by the difficult feelings and emotions that I had entrusted you with burying. I made vows to others not to see you – I meant them, but I broke them. Even though every time I saw you I would spend days afterwards unable to function and ravaged physically, I just couldn’t give you up – even though by this time what is a sober living home I wanted to. I wanted to be the person I saw in others I admired – the one who broke free. I had never really acknowledged the massive devastation that our relationship was causing in other areas of my life. I never blamed you for it at the time, but really I had ended up stuck in a life I didn’t want because of you.

Giving the best secret Santa gifts (Puppies for everyone?)

Every one of us has to heal and move on from all the hurt we caused each other. Your letter should communicate that you’re supportive. Patients going through the treatment process often experience anxiety. But the letter aims to show them that you still love them and support the decision they took to seek treatment. This will help you release all the negative feelings such as unforgiveness, anger, bitterness, or indifference that you may have towards your loved one.

It gives you the opportunity to be very honest with yourself and your relationship with alcohol. By the time we were in the thick of the pandemic, in 2020, I was three years sober, but increasingly coming close to drinking again. I spent almost all of my time working on my clothing business, facts about aging and alcohol national institute on aging my consulting agency and on my music podcast. I did not take any time off, which seriously affected my mental health. On the precipice of a relapse, I found inspiration in Elton’s own journey to sobriety – he went to rehab in the early 90s and has been teetotal ever since.

When I threw out my back, you comforted me for weeks and eased the pain. Like most relationships, ours has evolved insidiously. From students we made the transition via the career ladder to metropolitan home ownership and eventually, as the script dictates, to parenthood in the leafy suburbs. Hiding the truth about your addiction from them has always been a job for me.

“I’m leaving my bad relationships in the past!”

She is afraid to pick up the phone or view an e-mail or text if she sees that it’s from her daughter. After a few sessions, we composed a letter that she felt comfortable sending. I advised her not to e-mail it, text it, or call and have a discussion or leave a lengthy message, but to actually write it on real, live paper and mail it. Find a comforting card (flowers, dogs, or something along those lines) and place the letter inside of that. Sending something is tangible and can be read and reread, stored for the future, and not deleted with the touch of a key. If her child opts to toss the letter or rip it up then that’s her business, but it’s just a bit tougher to do if it’s on paper.

A Letter to Alcohol – Paul’s Naked Life

You are not alone in this battle, and I want you to know that my love for you remains steadfast, regardless of the difficulties we encounter. While addressing the impact of your husband’s alcoholism, acknowledge his struggles with empathy. Recognizing and understanding his challenges can prevent defensiveness and open the door to better communication and understanding. Start by taking some dedicated time for self-reflection. Think about your emotions, experiences, and concerns that are directly related to your husband’s alcoholism.

They say it’s not something that consciously happens, and it really was out of my control. But with help from a lot of caring people, I’m taking control of my life again. As much as it hurts to walk away from you, I’ll always try to remember the good times of my life and put the bad times behind me.

Your courage in facing this challenge head-on is a testament to your strength of character, and I am unwavering in my love and support for you. I want you to know that I stand by your side, ready to lend a helping hand or a listening ear whenever you need it. You are not alone in this journey; we are in this together, and together we are stronger than any obstacle.

Although I think my family may possibly like you more, you recognize how important my family is to me and have been in no way short of showing them love. You are not just a part of my life, but theirs as well and that makes them incredibly happy. Santa gets to travel across the world but only in one night. Think of all the local hot spots and destinations he is missing out on. It is unfair that he has to deliver billions of presents while the rest of the world enjoys their vacation time. So you’ve elected yourself as this year’s Holiday Cheermeister, there’s no shame in that.

Even when you made me feel depressed and dark, you would be there with me to howl and cry together. Even when you made me ill, you were still the tonic that would make me feel well. Even when I hated what I lie my life was, you were there to share the secret with me.

I realized your presence brought out the worst in some people. I operate from a clear conscious and a full heart nowadays since I left you behind. It’s nice knowing you no longer have a say in my thoughts, my actions or my life, for that matter, and that I’m driving this bus now. I get to decide how I spend my time and with whom I spend it with.

#10. The Hopeful Future Approach

Unlike face-to-face conversations that can sometimes escalate into arguments, an impact letter provides a safe and non-confrontational platform for communication. Your husband can read the letter at his own pace, allowing for reflection and understanding. “A happy family” – what a twee expression, the cynic, who walks hand-in-hand with the alcoholic in you, would say.

Open Letter from the Alcoholic

You can advise them to persist in treatment by pointing out the benefits of recovery. Moreover, you can boost their self-esteem by telling them all the things you love and respect about them. Letter 3 also works well because it shows support and offers encouragement. end stage alcoholism This example also attempts to boost the self-confidence of the reader by reminding them of their past success. When you want something, you focus on it, and you work hard until you get it. As a friend, I can’t tell you how proud I am of you for seeking treatment.

The Six Most Iconic Pitbull Lyrics Of All Time

In this approach, you gather friends, family, and possibly an addiction counselor to confront your husband about his addiction and encourage him to seek help immediately. I hope this letter finds you well, and I want to begin by expressing my love for you. Over the years, we have shared countless memories and built a life together that I cherish deeply. However, I can no longer stand by and watch the devastating impact that your alcoholism is having on both of our lives and our relationship.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *